Dagobah
-arrive on planet/speak with Yoda/Luke talks to Ben and finds out Leia is his sister/leaves Dagobah
*X-wing lands smoothly*
<Luke> Well, that was definitely a better landing than the last time. Maybe it was a good idea to let you fly.
<R2-D2> *whistles*
<Luke> You know, last time. When you got eaten by a krayt dragon.
<R2-D2> *whistles*
<Luke> Yes, you did! You don’t remember the krayt dragon?
<R2-D2> *whistles*
<Luke> Well, of course it was a bad experience! You were about to be digested!
<R2-D2> *whistles*
<Luke> Amnesia? Don’t give me that. Just go. I hate swamps.
<R2-D2> *whistles*
<Luke> You like swamps? Why?
<R2-D2> *whistles*
<Luke> Because you can fly? What does flying have to do with swamps?
*R2 starts flying across, does a backflip, a krayt dragon eats him and spits him back on shore*
<Luke> Wow. Déjà vu.
*Luke jumps to shore*
<Luke> Yoda! I’m back!
<Yoda> Hey, kid, how ya been?
<Luke> John! Long time no see. Do you know where Yoda is?
<Yoda> Turn around.
*Luke turns, Yoda Force jumps over his head and lands in front of him*
<Yoda> Returned, you have. Finish your training, you must.
<Luke> Ok. What do I have to do?
<Yoda> Move your X-wing, you must, before it sinks again.
<Luke> Ok. *starts using the Force to lift it*
<Yoda> Not like that. Too big, it is. Fly it.
<Luke> *sighs*
*Luke jumps into X-wing and flies it to land*
<Luke> Now what?
<Yoda> Now, the time is, for you to become a Jedi Knight.
<Luke> Really? What do I do?
<Yoda> *pulls out contract* Sign here, here, and here, and initial here, here, here, and here. Now I need your thumbprint here, and if you can prick your finger for a DNA sample, your application will be complete. Thank you for using Jedi Applications Express, and have a good day.
<Luke> *after he finishes* So that’s it? No ceremony?
<Yoda> Nearly forgot, did I, about the ceremony. One moment.
*Yoda disappears into his hut, comes back out wearing a suit jacket and holding a book*
<Yoda> Do you, Lucas Andromeda Skywalker, take the Jedi Order to be your lawfully appointed authority?
<Luke> I do.
<Yoda> Then I now pronounce you Jedi and Knight. You may ignite the lightsaber.
<Force Ghost Obi> Complete, your training is, Luke. Go now, you must, to duel Darth Vader.
<Luke> You again? What do you want? And why are you speaking funny?
<Force Ghost Obi > Tell you something, I must. And speaking funny, I am not. Like this, all masters speak when in the presence of the wise dyslexic one.
<Luke> Ok, fine. What is it that you have to tell me? You’re not giving away the plot again, are you?
< Force Ghost Obi> This time, supposed to, am I. Tell you, I must, that Leia is...
<Luke> My sister. You already gave away that little detail.
<Force Ghost Obi> Oh. Well, can’t you at least act surprised?
<Luke> No, I can’t. I was surprised the first time, and I’ve got to go.
<Yoda> Talking to yourself, you are? The first step into a larger world, you have taken.
<Luke> What? I’m not talking to myself. Ben is standing right here.
<Force Ghost Obi> I’m all in your head, Luke.
<Luke> Oh. That’s kinda creepy. So you’re all in my imagination?
<Force Ghost Obi> No, I’m literally inside your head, manipulating your senses so that you think that you’re having a conversation with me.
<Luke> Ok, now I’m officially freaked out. *turns to Yoda* Before I go, I have another question, about Force ghosts.
<Yoda> For one moment, wait. A conversation, I am having, with your first master, Obi-Wan.
<Luke> Uh...never mind. I guess you haven’t figured out how to get rid of him, either. I gotta go.
*exits*