Talk:The Seventh Star (novella)
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[edit] Ataru's Review
So, I finally got around to reading this, after having seen it lying around in Category:Novels. (I haunt that from time to time, looking for stories) A couple minor mechanics things: Chapter 8 has some confusion between Bolar and Balor. Furthermore, the correct spelling is Nautolan. In general, I thought the writing in Chapter 8 was a bit weaker, particularly the lack of a clean transition from Jali's and Tira's talking about the case to well…other things. I also had a hard time picturing the people and places in the story. The plot was interesting, the characters were well-conceived, realistic, and compelled me to read the story, but I really wished throughout the whole thing that there was more description. That, and a lack of internalization, seemed to be the weaknesses of The Seventh Star. I know that that sort of thing is stylistic, especially internalization, which if overdone can quickly bog a story down, but it's my belief that the novel would greatly benefit from a descriptive buff to help paint the picture, set the stage, and any other metaphors for description that one cares to toss out there. Thanks for the read. Atarumaster88 
(Talk page) 16:35, 7 January 2009 (UTC)
- This article is now nominated (by the author) as Featured Work. Ataru, can you place your review's negatives as objections? Darth Wylind
(Conference Room) 04:51, 8 February 2009 (UTC)
