Heritage-Chapter 37

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“I have great hopes for this war,” Shawnkyr was saying as the shuttle ramp met the deck of the Pillory. Her blue profile was strong and jaw set, an almost masculine air of confidence squaring her shoulders. The slick black hair of her people was tied in a severe knot on the back of her head, leaving the red glow of her eyes to leap out from her countenance without competition. “Terephon has been a magnificient success, even taking into account the loss of Teneniel Djo. At this rate, we could have the Baci subdued within a month.”

Jagged Fel preceded her down the ramp, a slight scowl darkening his handsome features, but that was nothing unusual. “Do you think Queen Tenel Ka will continue to lend Hapan aid, after what it has cost her?”

“Certainly,” Shawnkyr answered, her long strides easily keeping pace with him. “She is part Dathomiri witch, after all. They are a savage and vengeful people. But no action can be taken until she is officially crowned.”

“That won’t be a problem,” Jag assured her. “I have word that a ceremony is already being prepared on Hapes. She will be made Queen Mother before tomorrow night.”

“Excellent.” Anyone else might have smiled.

“What news from Contruum?” he asked after a pause as they continued to march across the hangar. A party had already exited the turbolift to meet the two Chiss officers, and was set on an intercept course.

“The prototype is ahead of schedule. I want you to go oversee the final stages of its construction, Jagged,” she added.

He cut a look up at her. “I am needed here. They have the plans they need.” His mind raced frantically, trying to come up with other viable excuses that did not include his sudden and irrational urge to spend every spare second with a certain Jedi. Still, he kept his face carefully neutral.

“Better to be safe about it,” the volume of her voice dropped the closer they came to the rebel officials. “After they crown Tenel Ka, I want you to take Spike Squadron and go to Contruum. Remember,” she blinked leisurely, deliberately at him, “we must keep our eyes on the greater victory. The one after the Baci have been defeated. But first, we have to actually defeat them.” Her crimson eyes glowed especially bright.

“Ambassador Nuruodo,” Admiral Ackbar’s grating voice called for their attention, and cut off any reply Jag might have made. In unison, both Chiss soldiers turned and gave crisp salutes. Ackbar’s oversized head dipped in greeting. “And Colonel Fel. I am glad to see you both well.”

Jag left the polite reply to Shawnkyr, and let his gaze scan the party. Besides Ackbar, there was his Uncle Wedge, Gavin Darklighter, Belindi Kalenda, Tycho Celchu, Pash Cracken, Corran and Mirax Horn, and the soon-to-be Queen Mother Tenel Ka. A well-rounded group. The only noticeable absence was that of a member of the Skywalker-Solo family, who was almost always present at important meetings. Jag felt a lump tighten in his stomach with worry.

“Why don’t we move out of the open,” Wedge suggested. “There’s a conference room ready just down the corridor.” Jag fell into step with Shawnkyr and followed the company of military leaders. Once inside and seated, Wedge again took the lead. “I’m glad to see all of you made it through the Terephon engagement. Overall, it was a military success.” His brown eyes flicked apologetically to Tenel Ka, who simply nodded, impassive. The lights darkened, and a three dimensional tactical map replaying the battle formed over the table. “As you can see here, the Baci fleet was greatly diminished as soon as it exited hyperspace into the minefield. After our own navy pushed them back against the planet and into the mines, they were so badly damaged that a retreat was ordered. Our probes indicate that the enemy is once again in orbit over the stolen planet Thrakia. They’ll want some time to lick their wounds, but Premier Cale Wilos is spiteful. He’ll move again soon, and in greater force. What we need to do now is decide where we want them to move. We have the power to draw them to a location benefiting us, if we play this right.”

“We should draw away from Hapes,” Shawnkyr spoke up after a moment. “We have to create a bigger prize than the capital. If we stay here, this is where they’ll move.” Her red eyes bore into Tenel Ka. “I think the Queen Mother and her people have suffered enough losses this time.”

The redhead inclined her elegant neck. “Thank you for your consideration, Ambassador. But Hapes is ready to play its part, whatever that may be.”

“Ambassador Nuruodo is right,” Corran Horn pressed the issue. “Hapes has done its share. The Jedi won’t see it fall as well.”

“You speak for the Jedi?” Jag frowned incredulously. All eyes turned to stare at him. He ignored their looks, too curious to leave it be. “Where’s Master Skywalker?”

“I’m only speaking for the Jedi in this meeting,” Corran answered patiently. “Master Skywalker is in the Medical Wing with his family.”

The lump in Jag’s stomach grew smaller and harder. He could barely breath. But it wasn’t the time, and he couldn’t let his concern for Jaina show. He swallowed his fear and nodded to the older Corellian, not trusting his tongue.

“What about Contruum?” Pash Cracken pulled the topic back on course. “We can bait them there, and then the shield strippers won’t have to be transported. We just put them in orbit and it’s a go.”

“Will the weapons be ready by the time the Baci attack?” Wedge raised his eyebrows at Jag.

“We estimate a month more, at the earliest,” he answered stiffly.

“Is it enough time?” Ackbar grumbled. “Cale Wilos will want quick retribution for this embarrassing defeat. He’s not one to sit on his hands.”

“We can stage hit and runs,” Gavin Darklighter suggested. “In and out of the Thrakia system quick, just enough to do damage and lead them on a wild mynock chase. We’ll keep them busy for a month.”

“What about Hapes?” Tenel Ka interjected. “Are we to leave her unprotected? Where will the fleet be?”

“We’ll hide, like in the days of the Old Rebellion,” a smile was spreading across Wedge’s face. “And they’ll be too busy worrying about where we are to strike at Hapes. We could move on Thrakia while they were gone, for instance. And you would, of course, keep the Home Fleet with you, Majesty, until the big push over Contruum.”

“They are Force sensitive, remember,” Corran reminded the group. “Any premeditation on our part could tip them off. They’ll sense the danger. This has to be as random as possible.”

“We won’t inform the pilots where they’re heading,” Gavin proposed. “No briefing, not even coordinates. We’ll pre-program them in the navicomputers. Everything will be kept under the strictest confidentiality.”

“This could work,” Ackbar rubbed a flippered hand over his fishy mouth. “And I don’t see a better alternative. When should we begin our little disappearing act?”

“As soon as possible,” Wedge suggested. “We’ll leave in 36 standard hours. After Tenel Ka’s coronation.”

The details were suspended for a later meeting, when each representative had hammered out the fine points for their own faction. Jag gave Shawnkyr a parting salute, a warm handshake to his uncle, and hurried as fast as he could—without being conspicuous—to the MedCenter.

• * *

The first thing Luke noticed as he stepped into his sister’s room in the Pillory’s MedCenter was that he could feel her reaching for him. The Force once again swam in waves around her person, echoes of the soul within. She had given up her boycott of the Force, and he thought he knew why. Quiet agony saturated her presence, but there was no darkness, as he would have expected.

All this he felt from Leia, but he could have seen it just as easily on her face. She lay back in the medical bed, her skin almost as pale as the sheets. Her eyes were red and sunken from tears. Their rivers had left dry marks down her sallow skin. Both of her hands were clasped in another, Han to her left and Padmé to her right. The same sadness was in their eyes.

Without a word from anyone, Luke knew.

“Oh Leia,” he went to her, bending to hold his sister tight in his arms. She embraced him with equal strength. He was at a loss for words, unable to fathom any sort of reply that would do any good.

“Han, Mother,” she pulled away, wiping at her eyes, “leave us, please. I need to speak with my brother.”

All three were surprised, but no one dared argue with her. Luke clapped a comforting hand on Han’s shoulder as he went by, and his old friend mustered a small smile of thanks. Padmé didn’t even look at him. Her gaze was lost in places unseen. When they were gone Leia turned her big, cheerless eyes up at him and said, “You were right, Luke.”

He sat down in the chair Han had recently vacated. “About what?”

“Everything,” she sighed miserably. “About the Force, and being a Jedi. If I had started my training all those years ago, if I had just listened, and become who you said I could be…none of this would have happened. Cale wouldn’t have been able to do this to a Jedi.” Her eyes filled with new tears. “And if I had listened, not cut myself off from the Force, I might have been able to save…”

“Shh,” he wiped her tears gently. “Don’t. None of this is your fault.”

Her countenance became suddenly fierce. “Don’t patronize me, Luke. It is my fault, and I know that. I accept that. And now I want you to help me change.” Luke’s eyes widened in question. She took a deep breath and said, “It’s time I become a Jedi.”

He couldn’t help it; his eyes trailed to the place where her hand rested on her stomach, once again flat and empty. “Leia, when you’re well, I’ll be happy to oversee your training myself. But I think you and Han should maybe sit back for a while and try to—”

“Luke,” her voice was brittle, and her small hand crushed his. “I have to do this. For me, for my child, and for every woman who has ever had to endure what I have. Cale Wilos has to die, and I will drag him to the grave with or without your help. So you can either train me as a Jedi to do this right, for justice and without anger, or I can do it on my own with hate.”

The Skywalker twins stared at each other unflinchingly for a few long, tense moments. Then Luke’s shoulders sagged as he let out a breath, and they both knew she had won. “I’m only doing this because you’re my sister,” he said after a time, “and because I know you. You’re too stubborn for your own good,” he softened the chastisement with a smile.

She tried to return the gesture, and only partially succeeded. “Thank you. As soon as I’m out of this bed and they say I can walk on my leg, we have to begin. We don’t have any time to waste.”

“Leia I can help you heal, but I can’t fix the past,” he squeezed her fingers lightly. “You understand that?”

“I know,” her lip began to quiver. “Can I,” she swallowed, and her volume dropped into a whisper, “can I tell you something, Luke, without you thinking I’m horrible?”

“Anything.”

“I don’t know what I feel,” she was shaking with emotion. “One minute I’m violently angry at Cale. The next I’m a weeping mess over this baby. And then there’s part of me—oh, Luke, there’s part of me that’s relieved.” She seemed to collapse into the bed at the admission. “I couldn’t help but love it, it was part of me. But all these problems, all the things Cale took from me, I can get back. I can start over with Han, truly. I am grieved to the depths of my soul for this lost life, but there is a selfish piece of me that can suddenly breathe again.”

His eyes softened tenderly. “I understand. And you’re not horrible. You’re one of the best women I have ever known.”

“Thank you, Luke. For everything.”

• * *

From the other side of the observation glass, Jaina watched her Uncle comfort her mother. She didn’t know what he was saying, but it seemed to do Leia good. For that she was eternally thankful. Leia had endured enough in this terrible war, possibly more than anyone. So perhaps, in some ways, this new curse was also a blessing.

The door to the visitation room slid open, and Jaina knew who it was before she ever turned around. Even so, when her eyes met his, a spike of electricity raced down her spine. They connected immediately, on a level beyond the Force. She heard his thought in her head like her own. He was incalculably relieved just to see her, so much so that for a moment she was afraid he would blow their cover. His will of iron ultimately kept him at bay, but only barely.

The moment passed, and she gathered her wits, very aware of the rest of her family in the room. “Colonel Fel,” she spoke up, beating anyone else to it. “What a surprise. Can we help you with something?”

He bowed to them all, but spoke to her. “Jedi Solo. I was hoping to have a word with you about the ground battle on Terephon. The Chiss records of the event are incomplete, and I thought you might be able to fill in the gaps.”

Jaina glanced from him to her father’s wary face, and back again. “As you can see,” she gestured behind her, “my mother is recovering. I don’t know if my family can spare me right now…” at the same time, she threw Han a pleading look. She would need his blessing to go, but oh how she hoped he would let her go.

He shrugged helplessly. “There’s nothing you can really do here,” Han replied. “She just needs time, and rest. Go ahead. Just don’t be too long.” She smiled at him, then followed Jag out of the room. They walked side by side, silent. The proximity was thrilling. She ached to touch him.

After a moment he leaned close to her and whispered, “Where?”

“I’m staying with Padmé, now that Mom’s going back with Dad,” she replied breathlessly.

He nodded curtly, and they made their wordless way to Padmé’s quarters. She keyed open the entry and stepped inside. The door had barely closed when she found herself in his sturdy arms, and they covered each other with soft, passionate kisses. “Kriff, I was so worried about you,” he buried his face in her hair. “I knew someone in your family had been hurt and I just—”

She laid her head against his chest and breathed deep. “I’m fine, it’s okay.”

“What about your mom?” he pulled away a little bit, just enough to look down into her face. “Is she all right?”

Jaina hid her face on his shoulder. “She has a broken leg, but that should be all healed after another dip in bacta. But she lost the baby, Jag.”

“Oh,” he held her a little tighter. He was conflicted inside, not sure what reply was appropriate. Was losing a baby she had only gained through rape worth apologizing over? “I don’t know what to say. I’m sorry?”

“It’s okay,” she ran her hands up and down his strong biceps. “She’s handling it well, considering.”

“Good,” his lips once again brushed her hair, and then her temple. Jaina lifted her chin in offering, and he claimed her mouth eagerly. They gave in to mutual longing for several minutes, then Jag drew back reluctantly.

Her face beamed up at him. “That was nice.”

He laughed softly. “We are in agreement, then. Listen, I don’t have long. I came to tell you something important.”

“What?”

“After Tenel Ka’s coronation, Spike Squadron is going to be transferred back to Contruum,” he winced in anticipation.

Her hands fell limply away from him. “What?”

“Those are my orders,” he swallowed. “I’m sorry.”

She ran one hand through her hair, blinking in disbelief. Finally she let out a short laugh and said, “I knew this would happen, but I didn’t think it would be this soon.”

“Look,” Jag wrapped her hands in his and stared into her eyes, “this doesn’t have to be the end.”

“I know,” she kissed their joined hands softly. “But it makes it so real.” Her smile as she met his gaze was thin, and her eyes moist.

Jag kissed her again, and stroked her hair out of her face. “I know. And I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize. We knew all along.”

They kissed one final time, and he retreated to the door. “I’ll see you tomorrow?” he asked before palming it open.

“Save me a dance, flyboy,” she winked at him playfully. He smiled, and stepped through the door. Her own smile wavered and fell as soon as he was gone, and her knees buckled. She dropped to the floor with a moan of despair, head in hands.

• * *

The painful lump once confined to Jag’s stomach had spread throughout his whole body by the time he left Jaina inside her quarters. He was one big, walking ache. It hurt just to let go of her, but even more so to know their already short time together was being so cruelly cut. He didn’t know what he was going to do. Even thinking about saying goodbye drove him crazy. He had tried to pretend he was all right for her sake, but inside it was eating him alive.

Other worries plagued him as well. Shawnkyr and the CEDF still seemed optimistic about making a peaceful takeover of the New Republic after the Baci were dealt with. As a Chiss soldier, Jag saw the opportunity and knew they couldn’t not take it. But as a man whose world was all at once beginning to revolve around Jaina Solo, he was torn to pieces. This had been partly his fault, and when all came to light, she would hate him for it.

He couldn’t bare that. To think that someday the memory of their fleeting but ardent romance would be sullied in her heart…no. It wasn’t a notion he could tolerate.

And even besides that, he was growing close to Wedge Antilles and his family as well. It would be a betrayal of their trust and acceptance. For the first time, Jag had found what it was like to be a human. Not an outsider, but someone who belonged. That wasn’t something he was particularly ready to give up, either.

The core problem was, the only way he could right things with Jaina was to be disloyal to the Chiss. Where did his true allegiance lie? Jaina was a dream, a fantasy that was coming to a swift end. To give up his future for something that would never come to fruition was madness.

But then, he had long since come to the conclusion that going mad and falling in love were very possibly the same thing.

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• Part of the Star Wars fanfiction Heritage

Heritage Chapter 30| Chapter 31| Chapter 32| Chapter 33| Chapter 34| Chapter 35| Chapter 36| Chapter 37| Chapter 38| Chapter 39